In High Gear

Today

was

a

very

bad

day.

Not a single bad thing happened. Good things happened. No reason – no excuse – to suffer.

I suffered so painfully, even though spc476 brought me flowers and kires came over and visited and did nice things to my windows and wlofie was sweet to me all day and gave me some of his root beer to go with fig newtons and the kiddos were rather quiet and well behaved and kind to me. When I wasn’t careful, my teeth clenched until they hurt. When I was careful, the muscles of my face ached from trying not to clench my teeth. My whole body felt as though I were wearing plate armor under my skin, something under the surface pulling me downward heavily. Especially my face. I felt on the verge of tears, but couldn’t cry.

I put up a fairly good front until late afternoon, when there was just no more strength for it. I sequestered myself in spc476‘s room and went to sleep.

It wasn’t any better upon waking, but there was a bit more strength to deal with it.

Gonna try to see the doctor tomorrow. The drug literature says that if things take a turn for the worse, to do so. I need to get wlofie seen tomorrow for his probably broken toe, so maybe I can squeeze in.

Me, me, me, it’s all about me. Wah.

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