I just heard they have a new test for colon cancer that you can get for free and do at home. It consists of a tissue paper square you drop into the toilet (along with the poop) and if a green dot appears, you go to the doctor. Just like that. Apparently you can go to any CVS store (this was on local news so I dunno if this applies nationwide) and just ask for the thing and they give it to you for free. Well, whaddya know. 

current image